It's NOT Valentimes Day!

Nothing drives me crazier than people who say "Valentimes". It's a disgrace to everything that St. Valentine stood for. Which was something I can't quite remember. Possibly love? I could research it but I'm really too lazy.

For all of these reasons, I have decided that this year I will give the ultimate Valentine. It will be a box with the simple words " Please BEE mine" written on it. "That's so cliché!" you might say. However, contained inside the box are 100 live bees, that are really angry from being shaken for an hour. So once the box is opened, my love will be expressed through 100's of bee stings, making my Valentine's flesh burn with pain and desire. After all, LOVE HURTS!