Ode To Asian Dude

Hey Asian Dude
Or maybe I should say Cliff
If that IS your real name?
"Why me?" you ask, throwing your hands up to the sky
I don't really have anything against you
Except maybe your happiness
And athletic ability
Plus I don't know how
You can justify
Having a website called NonSensical Gibberish
When everything makes sense
On your page
And nothing about it is random
Or nonsensical
Are you just trying to be witty?
Impress your friends?
Why do you feel you have to play ping-pong
Just because you're Asian
Way to live up to stereotypes

Check out Asian dude: www.nonsensicalgibberish.com

Hey Asian Dude!

I'm calling you out Asian dude. No, I am not some kind of racist. I know what you're thinking. You could be any race! It doesn't matter. And why, you may ask, am I calling you out? Why, you may ask, am I committing such uncalled-for libel against you over the Internet? Because this site is THE REAL NONSENSICAL GIBBERISH. DO YOU HEAR ME ASIAN DUDE? Change your URL! Do people really believe that you are a) nonsensical or b) full of gibberish? Take a look at the entire history of this blog (on your fancy-pantsy computer) and then maybe you can talk about being nonsensical.

Wait....what's that Asian dude? Oh yeah, that's right. YOU GOT NOTHIN'. This is an official calling out.

Dear Readers: please help me in calling this guy out. Leave some angry comments at www.nonsensicalgibberish.com. Serves Asian dude right for stealin my g-damn domain name!

Down With Asian Dude,

Mr. Editor

A Letter To Google Ads

Ah, I see that now we are alone, you and I, Google Ads. First of all, what's with the cold treatment? Have I said or done something wrong? Maybe. But why do you deny me so outright and forthwith? Fuck Google Ads....you know what? No, FUCK YOU! I've given you everything! And what do I get in return? JACK ALL. I even mentioned you! Like you deserved it. And you said I was too profane, obscene, rude. HA! What about you, Google? Huh, how many porn hits did I get when I typed in "hot hot sex" into your search engine? Many! Yeah, well I may be profane but at least I am not an Internet Pimp. So, take your ads and shove 'em, I don't need them anyway. So go ahead! Just try and shut me down.

Editor